


to this day

by hopeless_hope



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Abuse, Abusive Relationships, Angst, Child Abuse, Dad!Tony, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Father-Son Relationship, Hurt Peter, Ned Leeds is a Good Bro, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Physical Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Precious Peter Parker, Protective May Parker (Spider-Man), Protective Tony Stark, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Victim Blaming, Whump, Worried Tony Stark, actually not really idk, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-22
Updated: 2019-01-22
Packaged: 2019-10-14 10:33:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17506949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hopeless_hope/pseuds/hopeless_hope
Summary: Peter doesn’t know how he let it happen.He doesn’t know this now, but abuse isn’t something you let happen. It’s something that happens to you. It’s something that’s done to you.But to this day, he blames himself.orIt's months before anyone realizes May's boyfriend abuses Peter. The effects are lasting.





	to this day

**Author's Note:**

> Title taken from the poem "To This Day" by Shane Koyczan.
> 
> (This isn't edited - I'll do it tomorrow. I'm just tired and needed to get this posted before I delete the whole thing.)

Peter doesn’t know how he let it happen.

He doesn’t know this now, but abuse isn’t something you _let_ happen. It’s something that happens to you. It’s something that’s _done_ to you.

But to this day, he blames himself.

* * *

It starts on a sunny day, but that’s always how these things start – with a false sense of security and the belief that nothing can touch you when things are going _this_ well.

Ever since the Homecoming fiasco, things have drastically improved for Peter. Both Tony and Happy, upon realizing how badly they screwed up the first time, have started taking on more active roles in his life. Which is cool.

Tony even offered him a legitimate internship. Not that it can really be called that; mostly it’s just Peter tinkering around with scraps in Tony’s lab, occasionally playing with the robots while they listen to various styles of music.

He’s also started regularly attending decathlon again, and MJ is quickly becoming a steady fixture in he and Ned’s corner. It’s nice. It’s better. He’s got more people on his side than ever before.

Even May seems to be happier. Somehow, in between late shifts at the hospital, she’s managed to find herself a boyfriend, a guy named Brad who works alongside of her. Peter has yet to meet the guy, but he seems to make May happy, and that’s enough for him. She’s radiant.

And after everything they’ve been through, he’d do anything to keep her that way.

Peter meets Brad on a sunny day. The man strolls into the apartment, all dark hair with eyes to match, but his teeth gleam when he flashes a friendly smile. The man walks up to him to shake Peter’s hand.

The back of Peter’s neck prickles when they make contact, but he shakes his head, brushing it off as nerves. There’s nothing particularly threatening about the man, and Peter tends to get anxious around new people anyway.

He looks over to where May is watching them nervously, desperate for Peter to like Brad, and he smiles at her reassuringly, watching relief color her face.

Peter doesn’t know this now, but he’s been kickstarted on a journey downhill. By the time he’ll realize, he’ll have already gained too much momentum to stop.

To this day, he hates himself for ignoring his instincts.

* * *

“Oh yeah, I forgot to ask – how was meeting May’s boyfriend?” Ned asks as they leave decathlon practice. Usually MJ walks out with them, but today she needed to stay behind to discuss the season schedule with Mr. Harrington.

Peter shrugs. “It was fine, I guess.”

Ned shoots him a curious look, eyebrows raised. “Just fine?”

“Yeah, I mean, he seems like a pretty chill dude, I guess. They didn’t exactly stick around long before their date,” Peter tells him.

“That’s fair. I’m really happy for her, man. She deserves it,” Ned says, and Peter nods in agreement.

“For sure. Anyway, I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?” Peter asks as they start to go their separate ways.

“Yeah. Oh, I might call you later for help with the chem homework. I understood most of it, but I kind of got lost towards the end.”

“Of course. I finished most of it during study hall, so  just call whenever,” Peter tells him, and Ned sighs.

“What must it be like to be smart?” he groans dramatically, and Peter rolls his eyes.

“You’re a genius and you know it,” he scolds.

“You’re right,” Ned agrees. “Chemistry is just stupid.”

“Spider-Man thinks chemistry is amazing,” Peter jokes, and Ned laughs at him.

“Touché. I’ll see you later, man,” Ned says, walking off in the opposite direction with one last wave.

Peter quickly takes out his phone, scrolling through his notifications. He has two texts from May.

_Come home right after practice, okay? Brad’s coming over for dinner._

Peter can’t help the bolt of irritation that immediately flashes through him at that. For one, he had been planning on patrolling for an hour before going home. And secondly, because of May’s intense hours at the hospital to keep up with rent, Peter only gets to eat dinner with her two or three times a week. He doesn’t particularly want to share.

Underneath that, there’s another text from her.

_Is that okay with you?_

And Peter immediately feels guilty for his selfish thinking. May is a whole adult, and he should be thrilled that she’s comfortable enough to have her new boyfriend over with them for dinner. He quickly types out a response, trying to alleviate his own guilt.

_yeah, sounds good! be there soon._

When he gets to the apartment, he waits outside the door for a second, just listening. The back of his neck prickles uncomfortably, but then the sound of laughter filters through the door, and Peter smiles. It’s nice to hear May enjoying someone else’s company for once.

He pushes the door open. “May, I’m home!” he calls out.

“In the kitchen!” she yells back, and he makes his way over. May is just putting a tray of cookies into the over, her apron streaked with flour. Brad is sitting at the kitchen table watching her.

“Oh, are we having cookies for dinner?” Peter jokes, dropping his bag to the floor.

“You wish. They’re for dessert. I got Indian takeout for dinner,” she tells him, gesturing to the large paper bag sitting on the counter, and Peter’s stomach grumbles hungrily.

“Bless you. How was your day?” he asks as May rinses the flour off her hands.

“It was alright. Less busy than usual, which was a nice surprise. You?”

Peter shrugs as he takes a seat at the table. “School is school. But decathlon was fun today. MJ tried a new drill with us, and I really liked it.”

She gives him a knowing look. “That’s great, baby! See, I knew sticking with decathlon would be good for you.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Peter drawls, rolling his eyes. Across from him, Brad tenses and narrows his eyes at him, but Peter ignores it. “Aunt May is always right.”

May smiles and walks over to him, giving him a quick kiss on the forehead. “I’m glad you know it.” She turns to Brad. “Did I tell you Peter does decathlon? His team made it to Nationals last year.”

“I think you might’ve mentioned it.” Brad gives Peter an appraising look. “You must be very smart, Pete.”

Peter winces inwardly. They are definitely _not_ there yet. “I just really like science and math,” he says, as if that’s an answer.

“Do you want to go into the medical field like your aunt?” the man asks curiously, and Peter shakes his head.

“I don’t think so. I’m much more interested in chemical engineering,” Peter tells him.

Brad raises an eyebrow at him. “Wow! That’s pretty neat.”

May stands behind Peter, hands resting on his shoulders. “Peter even has an internship with Stark Industries, granted by Tony Stark himself,” she brags, looking down at him with pride, and Peter ducks his head in embarrassment.

“May!” he whines, missing the shocked look on Brad’s face. “It’s not that big of a deal,” he mutters, and May smacks him lightly on the shoulders.

“Oh hush, you’re being modest again,” she tells him, walking over to the counter to grab the containers of takeout and setting them in the middle of the table.

Peter just huffs in response, getting up to get plates for the three of them. Just as they’re all about to sit back down, the timer for the cookies goes off, and May hops back up.

“I forgot how fast this recipe is,” she comments as she puts on an oven glove. “You two can go ahead and get your food. I’ll be done in a second, I just want to move these to a plate.”

Peter nods and grabs the serving spoon, before pausing and handing it to Brad instead. The guy may give him odd vibes, but Peter can at least be polite. Brad smiles his thanks and piles his plate with food before passing the large spoon back to Peter.

Peter’s stomach growls impatiently as he piles his plate high with butter chicken, lamb curry, and white rice. He’s just reaching for the naan when he feels the weight of someone’s gaze on him and looks up to find Brad staring at him with a disapproving look on his face.

“Are you planning on leaving any food for your aunt?” Brad asks. His tone implies that he’s just teasing, but there’s an undercurrent there that tells Peter he’s completely serious. Peter shoots May an uncertain look as she sits back down.

“Oh, don’t worry! Peter’s a growing boy – I always order a little extra just for him,” she tells Brad, giving Peter a reassuring pat.

Peter can’t help the way the words sting anyway. He knows he requires a lot more food – he can’t help it, not since the spider bite boosted his metabolism. But May already struggles enough just to meet rent. Why should she have to go out of her way and spend more so he can eat extra?

Face burning, Peter withdraws his hand, deciding me can go without the naan.

To this day, Peter takes smaller portions.

* * *

May and Brad have been dating for two months.

For the most part, Peter doesn’t have to see them together too often, usually too caught up in the whirlwind of being a high school student to be at home much. Most weekends are usually spent with Ned and MJ or at the Compound with Tony, while during the week, he focuses on patrol and decathlon while May works.

But he never misses movie night.

Movie night happens every Saturday that May doesn’t have to work, usually once or twice a month, and Peter lives for them. They usually pick a genre and keep with that theme for the night, eating Thai on the floor in front of the television.

Peter is excited, because tonight is movie night.

May gets off from her shift at four, so Peter spends the morning at the Compound and has Happy drop him off before May gets back. When he walks into the apartment, he freezes.

Brad is sitting on their couch, dressed up in black slacks, a collared shirt, and a tie. Petals trail from where Peter is standing in the doorway to the candle-lit table, already loaded with platters of food.

“Um,” is all that Peter manages to say.

Brad looks up and gives Peter a fake smile that sends shivers down his spine. “Hey, Pete. I hope you don’t mind – I thought I’d surprise your aunt. Think she’ll like it?”

Ben used to do things like this for May. He’d dance with her in the living room and have flowers mailed to her, a hopeless romantic. You’d never think it of him, a stern, tough police officer. But Ben loved romancing the shit out of May.

So May would absolutely love this. Peter does not.

“Oh. Yeah,” he responds, heart sinking. He’d been looking forward to movie night for a while. Obviously, that would not be happening anymore.

“Is something wrong?” Brad asks, seeing the look on Peter’s face.

“It’s just that usually May and I have movie night on Saturdays,” Peter tells him, and Brad nods.

“Ah. Well, Saturdays come around every seven days, so it’ll be okay,” Brad laughs dismissively, and Peter tries to keep the irritation off his face as he walks over to the fridge for a snack. He takes a deep breath, trying to keep his frustration in check as he starts to make a sandwich.

He tenses even further when footsteps approach him from behind.

“Hey, so listen, Peter,” Brad starts, and Peter doesn’t even bother to look at him as he adds mayonnaise to his sandwich. “I know you and May are close, but we’re still trying to get to know each other. And, I was thinking, it’s just kind of hard to do that when you’re around.”

Peter stops at that, looking up at Brad with a confused expression. “I’m barely even home as it is,” he points out, but the nurse just gives him a cold look.

“You’re home enough. I understand you and May had a system, but I’m here now. So you’re going to have to make some room.”

Peter wants to cross his arms and tell him no. He wants to tell him that if he’s going to pursue a relationship with May, then _he’s_ the one who has to make room for Peter. He kind of just wants to tell Brad to fuck off. But then he thinks of the way May’s face lights up every time Brad enters the room.

So instead, he raises an eyebrow and slices his sandwich in half before giving the man an angry glare. “Is that all?”

Brad nods, and Peter darts past him, picking up his bag and walking right back out the door. And if Spider-Man starts patrolling more and more often? Well, that doesn’t mean anything.

To this day, Peter feels like a waste of space.

* * *

When Brad tells May that he’s taking Peter out to get to know him better, she’s delighted.

Peter is filled with dread.

“Oh, come on,” Ned says. “I’m sure it won’t be that bad. He seemed pretty nice when I met him the other day!”

Peter sighs as he adds another Lego to the USS Enterprise while MJ sits on the bed, reading a book.

“I guess.”

Ned shoots him a curious look. “Why do you hate him so much?”

Peter balks defensively. “I don’t _hate_ him! I just… don’t really like him. I don’t know how to describe it. He just gives me weird vibes, I guess.”

“Peter, _everyone_ gives you weird vibes,” Ned counters, and Peter wants to yell in frustration. He’s not even sure if the frustration is aimed at Ned or himself. Part of him thinks that maybe he _is_ just overreacting, reading into things that aren’t there just because he doesn’t want to share May.

The other part of him knows he shouldn’t have to make himself scarce in his own home.

He places another piece onto the creation and turns to find MJ watching him, brows furrowed. But then he turns back to Ned and shrugs.

“I suppose you’re right.”

The next day, after seeing a movie and getting dinner with Brad, Peter thinks that maybe Ned _was_ right.

The car ride there wasn’t nearly as awkward as he’d thought it would be. They made idle conversation and Brad shared some particularly amusing stories from patients he’d tended to. At dinner, he even sat down with Peter to _really_ talk to him.

“So, Peter. I really wanted to apologize to you,” Brad starts as they snack of chips and salsa. “I think maybe we got off to a bad start. I just want to make it clear that I’m not here to replace Ben. I know he meant a lot to you and May, and I’d hate for either of you to think I was trying to do that.”

Peter looks at him in surprise. This is definitely _not_ what he expected to happen. “No, no, you’re fine. I didn’t think that at all. You make May really happy. I think you’re good for her.” _Just not for me,_ he adds in his head.

Brad smiles, looking relieved. “I’m so glad. I was really worried there. So how is your internship going?”

“It’s good. It’s a lot of fun. I’ve gotten a lot of practical experience with mechanics and chemistry that I just can’t get anywhere else, you know?”

Brad nods, looking intrigued. “That sounds amazing, Pete.”

The rest of the dinner goes like that, each of them trading stories. And Peter can’t help but think he misjudged Brad, that he’s definitely not so bad after all. The addition of Brad into their lives might be a really good thing.

And then, on the ride home, the other shoe drops.

“So this Stark internship – I bet it pays good, right?” Brad asks nonchalantly, and Peter shakes his head.

“Nah. It’s not a paid internship. It’s just a good chance for me to get hands-on experience, and having it on my resume will already do wonders in helping me get a job,” Peter reasons.

He startles when Brad’s entire demeanor changes. Peter’s spidey senses go off, and Peter tenses as Brad pulls over sharply and gives him a furious look.

“You mean to tell me you’re not doing a damn thing to help your aunt out financially?” he spits, and Peter is still reeling from the sudden one-eighty.

“I – I don’t… what?” Peter stammers. He’s only fifteen.

Brad’s nostrils flare. “I was under the impression that the internship was a way to help out your struggling aunt. Not selfishly think of your own betterment.”

Peter is on high alert now, defensive and confused. What is this guy even talking about? Brad takes a deep breath, seemingly gathering his patience.

“Listen, _Pete._ Do you not fucking know how much your aunt is struggling right now? Not only is the cost of living in the city nearly driving her out of the apartment, but she has to worry about buying you _extra_ food and probably decathlon, too? And you’re not even _trying_ to help her? It’s bad enough that you’re not even her son, but she has to work herself into exhaustion almost every day, and you don’t do a damn thing to help. God, when I was your age, I worked to help my family. This is fucking ridiculous,” Brad finishes in disgust.

Peter just sits there, frozen.

In physics class, Peter once learned about Wolff’s Law, which basically refers to a bone’s ability to adapt to pressure. He thinks about that law a lot. Thinks about the world always seems ready to place one load after another on his shoulders.

He wonders if there will ever come a time when he is no longer able to adapt, if maybe he’ll just splinter right down the middle.

He thinks of all of this and looks down at his hands as he says, “I’m sorry. I’ll be better.”

To this day, Peter worries he it won’t be enough.

* * *

Tony knows something is up with the kid.

He’s known it for months, really. At first, he just brushed it off as stress. The kid is involved in a lot. It’s hard enough being a teenager in high school. But being a superhero, as well as doing an internship and other extracurricular activities? Not only is that physically taxing, but it’s mentally exhausting, too.

So for a few weeks, Tony does nothing more than keep an eye. He occasionally checks in on Peter through Baby Monitor, and other times, he just studies Peter while they work together in the lab.

The kid seems more worn down than usual. He talks a little less, has dark circles under his eyes, and seems to keep to himself a little more. Even on Saturdays, when they typically train with the rest of the team, Peter talks a little less.

Today seems to be no exception.

They’re sparring, which usually Peter loves. He’s typically about as chatty as Clint is, which is a lot. But this time, he stays silent for the most part as he spars with Tony, the rest of the team watching with furrowed brows.

Even with Peter’s super strength, Tony is able to fight even. He’s been in the game much longer than the kid. But the silence – that’s new. It’s concerning.

But then, Peter manages land a kick on Tony’s side, and Tony falters for a second. He freezes completely when Peter backs away quickly with wide eyes.

“I’m sorry!” he says almost frantically.

Tony immediately straightens, holding out his arms in a placating gesture. “Whoa, Pete, it’s okay. This is kinda the point of sparring. I owe you a congratulations, really.”

Tony’s concern only increases as a full-body flinch courses through Peter.

“Please call me Peter,” the boy whispers and Tony looks at him cautiously.

“Okay. That’s okay, I can do that,” Tony says calmly, and it doesn’t escape his notice that Peter is still slowly backing away.

“I’m sorry,” Peter whispers again, and dread pools in Tony’s gut. The excessive apologizing is new too.

“You’re fine, Peter,” Tony soothes carefully, as if talking to a wild animal. “No one’s mad at you. Why don’t you go upstairs and get cleaned up? We were the last round of the day anyway.”

“I, uh. I need to get home,” Peter tells him, already backing out of the room. “I – uh, thank you. I’m sorry. I’ll be better, I promise.”

Tony opens his mouth to stop him, but then Peter’s gone, leaving stunned silence in his wake.

For a moment, no one says anything. Steve looks about as concerned as Tony feels, Clint and Sam are exchanging worried looks, and even Natasha, face as stoic as ever, somehow manages to radiate concern.

“So that was definitely weird? Wasn’t just me then?” Tony asks the room, and they all shake their heads.

“Something’s not right, Tony,” Sam says. “Did something happen to him on patrol recently?”

"Not that I know of,” Tony answers, racking his brain. “Nothing out of the ordinary at least.”

“Do you think something might have happened at school? He has seemed a bit more down recently, but this is worse than I’ve ever seen it. He’s downright… timid,” Steve comments.

“I know,” Tony says grimly. “And I’m going to get to the bottom of it.”

(Sitting in the back of Happy’s car, Peter curls up in the seat and tries to breathe. He’s sure he just ruined everything. The pressure builds, and Peter wonders if this is it, if this is when he breaks.

To this day, he can’t handle being called “Pete.”)

* * *

After the one incident in the car, the remarks have only increased. Peter, for his part, has started applying to various jobs in the area, but so far, he’s heard back from none of them. He’s not surprised, considering how young he is, but Peter’s getting downright terrified to face Brad, knowing he still doesn’t have a job.

And, sure, there’s a part of him that knows he doesn’t technically have to listen to him and that he could also go to May, but she’s just _so damn happy,_ and he can’t ruin that for her. Plus, it’s not like Brad was _wrong._ May is under a lot of pressure, and Peter could do more to help out.

(It always comes back to pressure.)

Contributing to Peter’s anxiety is that the fact that Brad’s practically moved in at this point. He generally stays the night with May, and he’s often already in the apartment when Peter gets home from school. So, as a rule, Peter just tries to be home even less.

Ned and MJ know something is wrong, but they’re less inclined to pry, while Peter’s started avoiding his internship entirely.

But after Brad yanks him aside with a bruising grip, demanding to see his submitted applications, Peter grows desperate. He opens up the Stark Industries website and applies for their paid internship.

He figures his application will get lost in the masses, but at least he can show he sent it.

He wakes up to three missed calls and a text from Tony.

_Happy’s picking you up after school._

Which promptly tosses Peter into a spiral of anxiety that lasts the whole day. He hates himself for how anxious and on edge he is all the time now. The only time he feels okay nowadays is when he’s in the suit. Because Spider-Man is strong. Spider-Man can handle a rude boyfriend and Spider-Man is confident.

But Peter is a useless piece of shit. A burden, really.

When he walks out of school that day, he shoots a glance at the black Audi waiting for him and considers walking straight home, pretending he didn’t see it.

But then he sees Happy waiting outside the car, looking right at him, and Peter miserably walks over.

“Hi, Happy!” Peter greets, trying to sound enthusiastic.

“Hey, kid.” Happy opens the car door and Peter quickly scrambles in.

“Happy?” Peter prompts when they pull out of the school. “Why does Mr. Stark need to see me?”

“I’m not sure. He didn’t tell me. Probably just another suit update,” Happy guesses.

“I suppose,” he says uncertainly, settling back into the seat.

When they arrive, FRIDAY directs Peter to the lab and he makes his way down, finding Tony already working there. He doesn’t look up when Peter walks in.

“Can you hand me the one-eighth wrench?” he asks in greeting, and Peter quickly picks it up and hands it to him.

Tony quickly secures the bolt in place, and then straightens up to give Peter a good look.

“You look like shit,” he comments candidly.

“Thanks,” Peter says flatly. “Why am I here? It’s not an internship day.”

Tony leans back in his chair, locking his hands behind his head as he gives Peter a considering look.

“Funny that you mention the internship,” Tony says, and Peter’s heart flies into his thrown.

 _I should have known better,_ he chides himself.

“Oh?” He tries to play it off, even as Tony raises his eyebrows.

“Yeah. You applied for a paid internship,” Tony states, and Peter fidgets with the edge of his sleeves, rocking back on his heels nervously.

“Yeah,” Peter agrees. “I did.”

Tony narrows his eyes and picks up a screwdriver to twirl in his hand as he studies Peter with sharp eyes.

“Is May okay?” he asks, and Peter nods.

“Yeah. I just… I just wanted to start helping out, you know? Figured I should start doing my part around the house.”

Tony cocks his head at that. “Peter, you’re fifteen. You’re also Spider-Man. You’re doing way more than your part.”

Peter shrugs, trying to play it look casual. “I know, I know. I just know that May struggles to keep up with rent, and…” He trails off, embarrassed at complaining about their financial status in front of an actual billionaire.

Tony’s gaze softens. “Oh, kid. If you needed help, all you had to do was ask.” Peter opens his mouth to protest, but Tony cuts him off. “You’ve got a paid internship now.”

There’s something deep within Peter that collapses in relief, knowing that he can go home and have something in answer to Brad’s angry, questioning looks.

Maybe things will get better now.

To this day, Peter has more faith in money than himself.

* * *

Things don’t get better.

Peter brings home checks now, and Brad gives him words to remind his that it’s not enough. (It’s never enough. _Peter_ is never enough.)

May has finally noticed to the change in him. She sits him down and tries to talk to him about it, but he brushes it off as stress from school, and she’s ready to take it at face value.

Usually, Peter’s a shitty liar, but he’s willing to learn if it means preserving May’s happiness.

One day, when Peter and Brad are at the apartment while May works a late shift, things escalate.

Peter’s in his room working on homework for AP Lang when he hears a crash from the kitchen. He quickly runs out and finds Brad in the kitchen, a shattered plate on the floor in front of him.

“Are you okay?” Peter asks and immediately regrets it when Brad looks up at him with furious eyes.

“Do I fucking look okay?” Brad snaps, and Peter cringes back. “This is all your fucking fault,” he spits, leaning down to pick up a large shard of glass. “If you did your own damn dishes and pulled your fucking weight around this house, I wouldn’t have had to clean these dishes, and this wouldn’t have happened.”

There is a part of Peter, months ago, that would have protested. He would have pointed out how much of a stretch that was, how it was just an accident that could have happened to anyone, and ultimately _wasn’t his fault._

But the other part of Peter, the part that Brad has slowly grown into existence over months and months of snide remarks and degrading comments, accepts this as truth and apologizes immediately.

“Don’t apologize. Clean this shit up before May gets home and has to clean up after you,” Brad commands, and Peter doesn’t even think before dropping to his knees and picking up the glass with his bare hands.

He hisses when a particularly sharp piece slices into his hand, opening up a shallow gash that quickly starts to bleed, dripping slowly onto the floor.

Peter looks fearfully at the man, and Brad positively snarls, kicking out at him. Peter’s spidey sense sounds, but he forces himself to stay still. He knows this from years of bullying: you have to give them what they want now or they’ll make it worse for you later.

“You fucking _invalid!”_ Brad yells. “I’m so sick of putting up with you! You always screw shit up for me. I finally find a woman I actually like, but then it turns out I have to put up with her _freak_ nephew. Pick up this shit and get the fuck out!”

He sends one last kick into Peter’s side, grabs a beer from the fridge, and stomps out.

For a second, Peter just kneels there, arms wrapped tightly around himself. He’s completely numb, save for the ache in his ribs and sting in his hand. After months and months of verbal assault, Peter never thought the man would physically hurt him.

But now he has.

Peter doesn’t feel anything as he picks up the rest of the glass. He doesn’t feel anything as he quietly slips back into his room, doesn’t feel anything as he slips the suit on, and doesn’t feel anything as he makes his way to the roof.

Ironically, when he makes it to the top is when it all starts crashing down.

His breaths come in harsh gasps, and he wraps his arms around himself as tight as he can in an attempt to hold himself together.

“Peter,” Karen says in greeting. “You seem to be in distress. You hand is injured, and your ribs are bruised. I advise seeking medical help and lots of bed rest.”

“I can’t,” he sobs, wheezing under the weight of _how did I let this happen how do I fix this I can’t do this anymore._

“I can call Mr. Stark,” the AI offers, but Peter quickly shuts her down.

“No!” he nearly yells before taking a deep breath. “No. I just – can I just talk to you?”

The AI hesitates before answering. “Of course, Peter. However, I am unable to provide the human comfort that would be most helpful to you.”

“That’s okay,” Peter replies, trying to calm his breathing. “I just. I don’t know what to do, Karen. May has this boyfriend, and he’s just – he’s awful. I mean, I don’t even know if he’s really awful or maybe I’m just overreacting? I mean, I’m Spider-Man. I should be able to handle more.”

“What does he do?” Karen asks.

“It’s stupid. I shouldn’t even be upset. He pushed me into trying to get a job – he’s the reason I applied for the paid internship. He said I needed to pull my weight around the house.”

“You’re only fifteen,” she reasons.

He swings his legs off the roof. “Yeah, but he’s right. May does a lot. It’s just – he’s right most of the time. And I think I’ve mostly gotten used to the things he says to me? But then tonight, he dropped a plate and blamed me.”

“It’s not possible that it was your fault,” Karen interjects.

“I don’t know. He made it – it always sounds right when he says it. And it’s fine. But then he – he kicked me? Like, a couple of times. And I know it’s not that big of a deal – I deal with way worse on patrol – but I just never expected it?” Peter vents.

Karen is silent for a moment. When she speaks again, her voice is uncharacteristically soft. “Peter, that sounds like abuse.”

He balks at the word. “No! No no no, it’s nothing like that! It’s definitely not that bad. He’s just not very nice. But the thing is, he’s so nice to May and she’s so happy with him, Karen.”

Karen’s words are the words that break him, that splinter him right down the middle.

“You deserve to be happy, too.”

Peter doesn’t know what to say to that, so he says nothing at all.

To this day, Peter wonders if he should have just kept his mouth shut in the first place.

* * *

Peter wakes up to yelling.

He shoots out of bed and quickly runs out of his room. May is hurling clothes and Brad’s possessions at him, while Brad tries to calm her down, with little success. Peter watches the scene in confusion until he feels the weight of someone’s gaze on him.

He turns to find Tony standing in the doorway, watching Peter with sad eyes. And Peter instantly knows.

_They know._

For a moment, he’s frozen in a vacuum, dread and guilt and relief and despair sucking all the air out of him. Time stands still and all the gravity on his shoulders settles itself in the pit of Peter’s stomach, and May is yelling and Brad is cowering, and all Peter can think is, _I’m sorry._

(Brad planted those words deep in Peter’s brain, and they only ever grow bigger and bigger.)

He’s not sure how long he stands there before Tony gently walks over and steers him back to his room, sitting him down on his bed.

They just sit and listen.

Eventually, Peter turns to Tony and asks a single question. “Karen?”

Tony nods, arm still wrapped around Peter in support. “Yeah, kid. Even she has to report abuse.”

Peter flinches away at the word. “Stop,” he croaks, and Tony just shakes his head.

“Buddy… What he did – what he’s been doing to you – that’s not okay. That _is_ abuse. That’s why May is out there, fighting on your behalf,” Tony tells him gently, and Peter’s eyes well with tears.

“I just wanted her to be happy,” he says, voice cracking. Tony pulls Peter close, resting his hand on the back of Peter’s head.

“And she just wants _you_ to be happy. We all want that,” Tony says softly as Peter cries.

Eventually, the yelling stops and a door slams shut before his bedroom one opens. May walks in and sits on his other side, and she’s crying too, and Peter thinks about Wolff’s Law and how he’s spent months and months headed towards a breaking point and how now he has Tony and May to help him shoulder the weight, too.

He finally lets himself sag into their embrace.

Peter doesn’t know this now, but it’s going to be okay. He’ll wake up one day with a “good morning” on his lips instead of “I’m sorry,” and he’ll know that his happiness is allowed to be a priority. He’ll understand that none of what happened was his fault.

And to this day, his friends and family never let him forget how loved he is.

**Author's Note:**

> This didn't turn out the way I wanted it to, but it's okay. The message is there, and that's all that matters. (jk, i might rewrite it in the future) I've never really experienced physical abuse, but... I don't know. Emotionally, it's a different story. And I still hesitate to call it abuse, but my friends are very adamant about it. And I guess this is me working through that? Acknowledging that emotional abuse is often more prevalent and just as valid as physical abuse? And the effects last for such a long time afterwards. I don't know. I'm sorry.
> 
> I'm also sorry that it's not edited. It's two in the morning and I have an 8AM. I need to go to sleep. Comments and kudos are always appreciated and would be so lovely to wake up to. As always, come talk to me on tumblr @the-great-escapism. I'd love to hear from you.
> 
> (I may or may not write a sequel eventually. No promises.)


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